Here's a handy guide to coming out the closet

•  It is important that you are “ready” to disclose before doing so. Be clear on your own feelings about the matter. If you are still dealing with a lot of guilt or depression or are uncertain yourself, try to get some help in getting over that before sharing it with others. If you are comfortable internally, those to whom you come out will often sense that fact and be aided in their own renewed acceptance of you.

•  Timing can be very important. Be aware of factors over which you have no control that can affect another’s receptivity to your revelation.

•  Never come out to shock or disappoint during an argument. Never use this information as a weapon or to get back at someone by making them feel to blame for your sexuality or identity.

•  Be prepared that your revelation may surprise, anger, or upset other people at first. Try not to react angrily or defensively. Remember that the initial reaction may not be the long term one.

•  Emphasise that you are still the same person that you were before sharing the information.

•  Keep lines of communication open with people after having shared the news with them – even if their response is negative.

•  Be sure that you are well informed about the subject.

•  Remember how long it took you to come to terms with the issue and that it took even longer to decide to share it with others. Therefore, be prepared to give others time to adjust and comprehend the new information about you. Do not expect or demand immediate acceptance.

•  If you are rejected by someone, do not lose sight of your own self-worth. Remember that you were sharing an important part of yourself and that this was a gift to the other person that they have chosen to reject. Is any relationship so important that it must be carried on in an atmosphere of dishonesty and hiding?

•  Remember that the decision to share information about yourself is yours. Don’t be guilt-tripped into it by people who think that everyone has a right to know everything about you and that they have the right to ask inappropriate questions. You can usually decide, when, where, how, and to whom you want to reveal something so important about yourself. You don’t have to tell the whole world, and you don’t have to tell everyone that matters, all at once. You can do it in stages.

•  Try not to let your family and close friends find out aspects that you wish to share with them from third parties, such as neighbours or the media. Try to tell them personally beforehand.

•  It is advisable to try and establish a network of friends and/or family members first; whom you know will understand, support and accept you. Should your parents/guardians then reject you, you have a “safety net” of people around you that you can fall back on.

•  Should you still be financially dependent upon your parents/guardians, and you strongly suspect that they might reject you, consider waiting a bit before you disclose that information until you are in a better position to look after yourself.